500 Days of Summer

So, although I made it there late, I did get to see a good portion of 500 Days of Summer.

A fantastic movie. I feel like summer. I may not be as 100% behind my own beliefs like she is but I do 100% identify with her confussion, her desire to fall in love, the protection in the form of disbelief she uses to hide her phobia that it would never happen to her, her attitude to do what she wants and thats it. And the fact that she does really care about this guy and wants to be with him- but she doesn't love him. He asks Summer what is so great about her husband and she says something profound: He made me feel sure of the thing I never was with you.

She's not a bad person. and it's sooooooo nice to be adored. And yes, I've felt like him before too- although never to that degree (is that a crime?) I just want to fall crazy in love for a once. No I meant that sentance just as I wrote it- fall in love for a once. Once and for all. I've been in love before. But I always knew they would pass.

The hard part is, like my mother, I'm a physical girl. I need that touch stimulation to let me know you're there with me. I like to cuddle and hold hands and kiss and snuggle and poke and smack and rub and hug! I like if when someone tugs on my hair or plays with my fingers. I love it when I can close my eyes and know you're still there. I'm not talking about sex, or making out, or even just with boys. Rather, to fall asleep in your arms. To know you want to touch me too. To lean in on the inside of your arm when we watch TV.

You know that was always my dream? I want a boyfriend/husband/friend who can sit with me and watch a movie. I'll hold onto you.

Anyway, please see 500 Days of Summer. I don't know how perfect the end feels, but it is a real end. Go. do it now. I command thee.