My bad. Again.

Y’know one comforting thing in life?
It doesn’t matter what happens, everything is my fault. It doesn’t even matter how many times I apologize and roll over for another beating. The reason I’m being beaten, is my fault. I literally can do nothing but screw up. Especially to guys. It was one of those weekends where I spent almost the entirety being yelled at. And I strive to be humble- which you will doubt 10 seconds after you tell me I’m too hard on myself. (You should really pick which one I am.) but I can only take so much when suddenly it’s 4 am and I haven’t eaten anything all day and another person has called/or emailed to tell what a soulless harpy I am. With so many telling me so, it must be true. It must be nice to know it’s always Casey’s fault. If you haven’t yet, please come take a whack at this dead horse. I can’t feel anything anymore, trust me.

On a related note, I’ve decided to become gay. I will never please anyone so I may as well live as a lesbian mormon and give big speeches about how I can stay true to the church despite my homosexual urges.

I’m dreading my birthday tomorrow. I can see myself being wildly disappointed in myself- just like everyone else.