Saturday, April 5, 2014

Get away

I think I really need to get out of here. Out of the ward. Out of California. Away from everyone here. People who are getting married (LDS and not), and away from this mediocre existence. The Dorkwad is worst. In all ways, that friendship seems corrupted. To top that off, he can't even give me a warning about his new gf? How am I expected to deal with that bomb from out of no where? Like nothings changed? Of course it has and that's OK but... after all this time I don't deserve a headsup? A nod of civility in my direction? Talk about feeling used.

So officially as of last night, I have nothing to stay for. Even Masasto is finally leaving the country so if I was truely dumb enough to visit that disaster again I couldn't.

So I guess everyone is moving on from me. I'm going to leave his keys in the mailbox and just get out of here. My mother has always been a big fan of the restart button but I never was as far as it applied to relationships. But maybe this is how it manifests in me.

If everyone is going to move on, then I don't want to stay... I don't even care where I go, as long as it's not here.

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